Grateful: Seven Times, One Month, Magic Word — Distributed

I lost 100 followers and felt deflated, discouraged, and defeated. And then I read the magic words.

Janice Eastman

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A person shuffle a deck of cards.
Photo by Edson Junior on Unsplash

Chosen for further distribution is every Medium writer’s wish.

And when it happens, it’s like a storm that brings an emotional response that is hard to explain.

The first time you open your stats and read “Chosen for further distribution” is a momentous occasion. I felt like a writer and like my words were going somewhere. Validated on a space where so many people are trying to get curated.

For lack of better words, it’s like magic.

It’s like music to the ears.

Or, like being elevated to a higher level of consciousness. Almost like a drug that gives you an adrenaline rush.

When it comes to writing, this month has been a struggle for me to stay focused, intentional, and productive.

It’s been hard to wrap my head around losing almost 100 followers at the start of the month. And watching my views drop by nearly one thousand caused me to feel some way — jaded if you will.

I have questions.

Why did they leave me? Was it something I said? Or did I do something to turn them off?

I can’t stop analyzing my every move.

I’m so paranoid of another follower-drop that I almost feel like I’m back in the grind, picking apart every move I make, trying to ensure I’m doing the right thing, staying the right things, and writing the right stories.

The feeling of abandonment is new to me. And it’s something no one should have to go through. But it’s a part of the game — it’s the way of the digital world.

No one said it would be easy.

But, to know that my words are being seen, read, and shared by thousands of people is validation enough.

I’ve stayed positive and reminded myself that I’m building a “legacy” on the other side of this. And I’m determined to keep going.

I’ve been given so much inspiration from other people’s stories, and I’ve been in awe of the support I’ve received…

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Janice Eastman

From reading my writing, I hope you will begin to break down self-imposed barriers and find your authentic self in the extraordinary story of life.