The Double Bind of Life: How to Make Better Choices & Find True Happiness

Every decision brings responsibility and freedom

Janice Eastman
4 min readMar 7

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A person on a wooden fence is holding a lasso.
Photo by Venti Views on Unsplash

Life can be hard! There is no doubt about it. Leaving us between a rock and a hard place.

From the everyday struggles of juggling work, family, and relationships to the impenetrable tribulations of life-altering choices, it can be overwhelming to stay afloat. And keep our heads above ground.

Too often, though, the difficulties of life force us into a double bind; we feel like we must choose between conflicting demands, and whichever option we choose, it never seems to be the right one.

This relationship between choice and dissatisfaction can stand in our way of finding genuine joy and contentment.

I remember when I was a young woman and struggled with the difficult decision of whether to stay in an unethical job or take the risk of leaving a comfortable position.

I agonized over the potential repercussions of both decisions.

Still, ultimately, I chose to leave — an experience that taught me to weigh decisions carefully and to recognize that there is no one correct answer.

Although I’m still in the process of forging a new path, I know that every decision comes with some level of risk.

However, when we use our wisdom, consider our values, and make educated choices, life’s choices become less daunting, and more hopeful.

Double bind in a nutshell

The double bind of life has been described as a dilemma in which individuals are given two or more alternatives. And regardless of which option they choose, it may lead to undesirable consequences.

Essentially, the double bind of life refers to being caught between two opposing choices — neither of which can turn out well no matter what we decide.

This way, making decisions and finding true happiness can feel impossible when stuck in this cycle.

But if we turn inward and trust our intuition, our choices can be guided by wisdom and a sense of hope instead of fear.

The science behind making better…

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Janice Eastman

From reading my writing, I hope you will begin to break down self-imposed barriers and find your authentic self in the extraordinary story of life.